Tuesday, April 19, 2005

Top 10 Ways to Bear Market Proof Your Relationships

Do you want to keep your intimate relationships in a “Bull Market,” and out of a “Bear Market”?

We hear stories daily about individuals or organizations that thrive during the bull market, slip in the bear market when stocks drop, and end up bankrupt. Others suffer a loss, but plan for a turnaround and don’t experience devastation.

How do they weather the bear market? They manage their portfolio wisely.

Close, personal relationships can follow a similar path. Many start out
in a bull market, slide into a bear market, and then go bankrupt. Like investors, you can weather your relationship ups and downs if you manage your relationship portfolio wisely. Apply these ten rules of wise investing and avoid relationship bankruptcy.

1.LIST ASSETS AND LIABILITIES

If you want great relationships, first know who you are and what you want. What are your values, beliefs. If you do not know what you believe, you may get off track.

2.DETERMINE GOALS.

Where are you and where do you want to go? What are your personal and relational goals now, and in the future? If you do not know what you want over the long term, you may get off track.

3.READ THE PROSPECTUS.

4.DECIDE WHICH INVESTMENT BEST FITS YOUR GOALS.

With investments you consider whether you want short term, long term, high risk, or low risk investments. You decide whether you can reach your goals with stocks, mutual funds, or money market accounts.

What do you need, want, and require in a close relationship? What kind of relationships will support your life goals? Imagine you love the country and want a cabin in the woods some day. You invite loss of your dreams if you continue to invest emotionally in someone who loves the city lights and hates bugs!

Where will you find compatible relationships or life partner who shares your wishes, hopes and dreams? Probably not in the local bar, unless that is your life goal. Do what you love to do, and find friendships in those places.

5. DON’T THROW GOOD MONEY AFTER BAD.

If it drops 8% or more sell.

If you are single, don’t get hooked into a relationship that is not working. Don’t continue to invest emotional capital and stay for convenience. I often see individuals who complain about how unfulfilling their relationship feels. He has kids from a prior marriage. She can’t stand them. Or, she wants a child someday. He insists he will never have children. They fight over differences, but they insist on trying to make it work. Redo steps one and two. Diversify.

If you are married, especially if you have children, the relationship becomes more than one investment. It becomes a complete portfolio. Identify and appreciate the investments that bring in returns. Identify asset drains and find solutions. Don’t stick your head in the sand and hope your portfolio will fix itself. Don’t wait until you lose all your assets. If you need help, get it.

6.START EARLY.

To build a successful relationship portfolio, begin to invest emotional capital immediately.

7.INVEST OFTEN.

Continue daily. Invest in relationship skills education. Make frequent emotional investments including affection, support, fun and laughter. Don’t just invest when the market is up and things go well. Invest when the market slips a bit, when the relationship feels distant, or one of you experiences a bad day.

8. STICK WITH SOLID INVESTMENTS OVER THE LONG HAUL.

If you take the time to choose a life partner wisely, your relationship portfolio should bring in returns and prove solid over the long haul. You will choose a life partner who shares your values, hopes and dreams. You will not feel pressure to compromise your values or desires or spend hours fighting over deal-breakers.

9.WATCH YOUR PORTFOLIO AND MAKE ADJUSTMENTS WHEN NEEDED.

Keep an eye on your portfolio and make adjustments when needed.

10.DON’T GET DISTRACTED BY NEW OPTIONS THAT PROMIST SHORT-TERM REWARDS.

Learn to weather the ups and downs and stick with a good investment for the long-term.

You lose vast amounts of emotional and financial capital when you do not choose wisely in the first place.

You may not control the markets. But you can manage your personal and financial investments. Apply these five rules and create a strong relationship portfolio that pays dividends in a “Bull Market” and in a “Bear Market.”

Information about the Author:

©Pat Swan, M.S., Life and Relationship Coach, http://www.RelationshipSkillville.com . Pat is a speaker, coach, and author of “Watch Out! Your Relationships Can Be Hazardous to Your Health,” available at http:// www.StopRelationshipStress.com . Stop relationship stress and discover secret remedies for better health. Mailto:pat@patswan.com . PH: 262-642-5706.

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